Ghost Rider vs Half Nelson

Ghost Rider isn’t a very good movie. You know what is? Half Nelson. Half Nelson is a very good movie. Stay home and watch it instead of Ghost Rider.

See how easy that was?

Ghost Rider is based on the Marvel Comics character of the same name. It stars Nicolas Cage, in what just might be his most boring performance ever. Cage can usually be depended on to give an interesting performance even if the movie’s not so great, but here he looks sleepy. Johnny Blaze (Cage) is a stunt-cyclist, performing for screaming arenas full of sluts and rednecks. He only does one stunt per show, but he packs the house and everyone loves him, to the point that paparazzi wait outside his dressing room door. One of them is Roxanne (Eva Mendes, who has zero chemistry with Cage or me), a reporter who a. can barely string a coherent question together and speaks like she’s got a mouthful of Gummi Bears, and b. had a love affair with Johnny when they were both ten years younger and played by different actors that only resemble Eva Mendes and Nicolas Cage if you turn your head and squint into a mirror.

But Johnny can’t love Roxanne, because he sold his soul to the devil all those years ago, and will soon be the Ghost Rider, used by the devil on Earth to battle Blackheart (Wes Bentley) in the race to collect the most souls. The Devil is played by Peter Fonda. Sam Elliott plays exactly who you would guess he plays, in exactly the same way.

It’s just not good. The Ghost Rider special effects are all right, with the flaming skull and fancy bike, but I never regarded him as a character, or even as anything truly related to Johnny Blaze. He was just a special effect. When I see Spider-Man, I think of Peter Parker; Ghost Rider conjures no such thoughts. The villains are one-note (or less. Peter Fonda and Wes Bentley are the least scary film devils since that movie with Jennifer Love Hewitt that didn’t even get released), the attempts at humor miss by a mile (in his human form, Johnny loves jelly beans and the Carpenters. Wacky.), and, worst of all, Ghost Rider never pops a wheelie.

So see Half Nelson instead. I know there’s usually a theme here beyond “See this one instead of that one”, but it’s one I missed last year, and I’d like to get the word out as soon as possible.

Ryan Gosling stars as Dan, a junior high history teacher. He’s a cool guy, wearing his sunglasses into the classroom, and talking more about philosophy than actual textbook history. His kids listen, for the most part; he’s especially connecting with the young girls, some of whom are also on his basketball team. Dan’s not much of a teacher, in terms of the qualities movies usually require. He’s not trying to reform street toughs, or teach kids the power of reading, or trying to end violence. He’s too busy getting high.

Dan, we gather, has been doing drugs for a long time. When his ex-girlfriend pays him a visit, he comments that she looks healthy; she doesn’t return the compliment. Mainly, Dan looks exhausted, although he musters the strength to show up for school each day, coach ball at night, and hit the bars looking to score.

He bonds, in a quiet, sad way, with Drey (Shareeka Epps), a student who learns his secret. There’s not much fear of Drey ratting out her teacher. She’s surrounded by sad adults, and probably feels like telling one about another will just end up in one more being taken away, like her older brother. So she keeps quiet, offering friendship and a shy, genuine smile to her mother, Frank—a local drug dealer—and Dan, who needs Drey as a safe constant in his life, even though the opposite should be true. Drey is the closest Dan has to a role model.

They’re so good. Gosling and Epps give the kind of natural, human performances that I think most actors think they’re giving when they go for “real”. A day later, I can’t stop thinking about them (it’s also been a day since Ghost Rider, and I already had to hit the IMDB to look up character names). Gosling never overplays the effects of Dan’s drug use or hangovers. He looks and sounds like someone who has figured out exactly how much he can snort, smoke and swallow at night and still get his tie on for work the next day (although, by the end, dude looks like hell).

Half Nelson was written and directed by Ryan Fleck (Ghost Rider? Written and directed by the guy who did Daredevil. Ryan Gosling’s agents: get unlisted phone numbers, ASAP). There’s a moment, near the end of Half Nelson, where one character hands another some money, and it’s heartbreaking. Fleck makes sure we know these characters, and that we believe the extent to which they know each other. Half Nelson reminded me of a gentler Leaving Las Vegas, or a tragic, domestic Lost in Translation. It completely cleansed my soul of the boring evil that had infected it the night before. I knew I was seeing the Spirit of Vengeance this weekend, but it was in Half Nelson instead of Ghost Rider.

Ghost Rider: D
Half Nelson: A