Speed Racer vs American Movie

If the kids from Charlie and the Chocolate Factory collaborated on a film, and hired, say, McG as a director, allowing him to subsist only on electro-shock and Red Bull snowcones, you might end up with a movie like Speed Racer. How much you appreciate Speed Racer depends on how much you enjoyed the original cartoon, and how much you’d mind being trapped inside a pinball machine for a couple hours. I’ve never watched the show for more than a scene or two, but I have to admit, one of those Red Bull snowcones would hit the spot about now.

For many of you out there, it will be enough incentive that Speed Racer was directed by the Wachowski brothers. Speed Racer definitely maintains the Wachowski’s flair for the visual, but they’ve all but ignored any attempt at developing characters, establishing a plot or following either cohesively. And before any of you defensively say, “but it’s for kids”, then allow me to remind you that the Pixar films are primarily for kids, and are endlessly entertaining without pandering or dumbing down. (Pandering and dumbing down might include, for example, monkey-poo jokes, and a subplot involving stolen candy.) Also, that “just for kids” defense is precisely the bullshit trotted out by George Lucas when you guys didn’t like Phantom Menace.

Speed Racer is essentially a 2 ½ hour podrace, so your affinity for those Phantom Menace scenes will come into play during Speed Racer. I think the podrace scenes are boring and repetitive, so there you go, except a. the racing scenes in Speed Racer are punctuated by awesome, constantly changing backgrounds, featuring at the least neon chasers, and at the coolest galloping zebras; and b. Christina Ricci. In hotpants. And a helicopter. The Wachowskis are at a loss with what to do with actors, whether they’re good (John Goodman and Susan Sarandon play Speed’s parents, with the least amount of commitment they’ve ever brought to anything, and come off just fine), or bad (Oh my. My my my. There is a kid actor in Speed Racer that grates.), but in the case of Ricci and Emile Hersh (as the title character), they just let the cool kids exist, trusting that we’ll find them through the haze of edits, sound effects and slow-mo. Once in a while we do, and Speed Racer, in those passing glimpses, is a pretty fun time.

Speed Racer, for its random charms, is one of those movies that left me exhausted. Not too tired to watch another movie, but definitely too timid to tackle anything else that might include cars that fight (oh, I forgot to mention: in Speed Racer, the cars fight. As in, they’ll actually jump up and kick each other. Yeah, some of you are not going to like it.) I turned instead, to the low-key charms of American Movie.

You cannot get further from Speed Racer than American Movie, at least on the surface. American Movie is a low-budget documentary about the filming of an even lower-budget horror movie. And in Mark Borchardt and Mike Schank, we get two heroes way more endearing and underdoggish than anyone in Speed Racer. Mark and Mike might be slow-witted slackers, but by the end of American Movie, you’ll be rooting for them to win something, anything, even if it’s just a free scratch-off ticket.

Mark Borchardt is an independent filmmaker living in Wisconsin. For the past decade or so, he’s been trying to fund and film a movie called Northwestern, which appears to be sort of a Leaving Las Vegas story about the breakdown of an addict in a small town. It’s meditative, black and white, and due to the unusual length of the filming schedule, features a leading man who’s aged from a short-haired teen into something…well, let’s be nice, okay? Mark Borchardt has been through a lot, and he doesn’t need me pointing out his mullet.

To fund his dream project, Borchardt gets the idea of making a quicker, easier and more crowd-pleasing movie in the meantime: Coven, a thirty-minute, black-and-white horror film. Coven, Borchardt reasons, could be filmed on the fly, put on DVD, and sold for fifteen bucks a pop. Soon, he’ll be rolling in money and he can refinance Northwestern. All of this might be possible if Borchardt could also get the money together to make Coven, which he cannot unless his rich, confused uncle comes through with his inheritance, or maybe if Mike Schank scratches enough Lotto tickets.

About Mike Schank: Is this the nicest guy to ever appear on film? Possibly. He’s a bit like Garth from Wayne’s World. Mike Schank is sweet-hearted, a bit slow on the uptake, baked beyond retrieval, and so good on guitar he can play blindfolded. Mike Schank (always identified by both names in the film) is Mark’s best friend, his assistant director, his score composer, and thanks to a few winning scratch-offs here and there, a co-producer. He’s also seriously funny, especially during one extended monologue about a visit to the hospital during an acid trip.

American Movie was directed by Chris Smith. You probably have questions about how Smith found Mark and Mike, and how he was able to make a documentary about them while they were making their film, instead of after. Just go with it. American Movie is so charming, low-key and believable, you’ll check your questions at the door.

It’s interesting to me that American Movie came out in 1999, the same year the Wachowski brothers debuted The Matrix. In the intervening years, they’ve definitely made more money, but I’m not sure they’ve advanced much in their art, aside from, you know, making cars fight. Almost makes you wonder what Coven might look like with a hundred-million dollar budget, and how many sequels it might have spawned by now.

Speed Racer: C+

American Movie: A-