Please Give vs The Blind Side

Please Give begins with a montage of breasts being placed—wedged, plopped, forced, squished, squeezed—into a mammography machine. Several in attendance, completely adult, giggled throughout, because: hee, boobies. Those of us in the audience who have seen Nicole Holofcener movies (and tits) before, knew something else was up. Holofcener’s movies always feature female characters prominently, often in uncomfortable situations, and at times at odds with their bodies and the way they’re perceived by men, other women, and in the mirror. Holofcener’s never soapboxy about this element to her films, allowing her characters (and the voyeurs in the audience) to remain as flawed, shallow, and human as they please.

Catherine Keener is Kate, a woman who owns an antique furniture store with her husband (Oliver Platt). Their successful business hinges on buying the furniture of the recently deceased (from desperate, grieving, uneducated family members) at a low price, then marking way up for resale. They own the apartment next door, which is currently inhabited by an angry old woman they not-so-secretly hope will die soon. When she’s gone, they can knock down a wall, increase the size of their home, and sell off her furniture in the store. They’re nicer than they sound. Kate is especially kind, partially out of her yuppie guilt, and hands out food and money to the homeless people on her block. Her husband and daughter (Sarah Steele) would prefer to enjoy their good fortune and spend the money on more meaningful things, like overpriced jeans.

The old woman next door, Andra, (played by Ann Guilbert with just enough viciousness that she still retains our empathy) is cared for by her granddaughters, Rebecca and Mary (Rebecca Hall and Amanda Peet, respectively). Rebecca, the mammographer from the opening credits, is sweet and lonely, and though she seems exhausted by it, also enjoys spending time with her grandmother. Mary is shallow and materialistic, and is eager for Andra to die, so she can spend as much time as possible working on her tan and stalking her ex’s new girlfriend. Mary and Rebecca share a tiny little apartment (they sleep across the room from each other, as they might have as children), so you’d think they’d want the grandma’s home when she dies, but it never comes up, not that they could afford it anyway.

The centerpiece of Please Give is a dinner party thrown by Kate for Andra’s birthday. It’s her birthday, possibly her last, and it’s an awkward, funny, sad, eye-opening night for all (except for poor, mean Andra, who thinks the cake is dry, doesn’t know who half these people are, and is rude throughout a conversation she can barely hear).  Rebecca is embarrassed that Mary wants to know what Kate’s family has planned for Andra’s apartment. Are they renting it? Knocking down a wall and expanding? Mary disarms everyone with her bluntness, to the point of endearment. They’re all so shocked by her personality that they wind up sort of charmed. Rebecca may be the sweeter of the sisters, but she’s potentially wasting time by not making her feelings known. No one can say that about Mary. Rebecca Hall and Amanda Peet are fantastic. Peet especially delivers. Mary has such an unappealing checklist of character traits, but she’s never a cartoon, and never truly the villain (although she does terrible things). I’ve been a fan of Amanda Peet for a long time, but she’s never connected like she does in Please Give.

Please Give is the fourth film pairing Catherine Keener and Nicole Holofcener. Over the past decade or so they’ve created some interesting characters, but none as secretly complex as Kate. Most of her generosity is anonymous. She intentionally buys certain items from clients out of guilt and charity, rather than actual interest. And she doesn’t do a lot of talking about it otherwise. Does she give because she has so much and feels guilty? Does giving make her feel important? Does race play a role? I have a lot of questions for Kate, which is, in a way, a sign of Please Give’s success as a movie. Near the end, Kate and Rebecca share a kind smile, and each nod in agreement. Movies that don’t trust me as much would force a conversation into the mix, to help guide me through their emotions. Sometimes a nod is all I need.

The Blind Side is also a movie with a strong female character dealing with guilt and charity. And while it’s based on a true story, little of it rings as true to me as Please Give. The events of The Blind Side may actually have happened, but they were apparently events with all the beats of your typical sports movie.

Sandra Bullock plays Leigh Anne Tuohy, a Memphis interior designer who lives in an enormous house with her family and never misses a football game. Leigh Anne is one of those quick-talking tough cookies we meet in movie sometimes. She’s got a dry sense of humor, takes no bull and always has the perfect insult. But get this: she’s like a lion when it comes to her family, and she’s got a secret heart of gold! So if anyone’s wondering why Sandra Bullock won an Oscar, it’s because she took this tired, overdone character, and made it okay to spend two hours with her. I don’t mind a smart-ass, but all that self-satisfaction and self-congratulation wears thin after a while. Leigh Anne doesn’t wait in line; she marches to the front to see what’s the hold up.  Leigh Anne doesn’t just cheer from the sidelines; she walks out on to the field to coach the team herself. I’m guessing she parks wherever she wants and tells you to shut up if you complain that she talks on her phone during a movie. But hey, based on a true story, so I’m sure the real Leigh Anne is just like that.

The Tuohys meet Michael, a huge, lonely kid with no place to stay. They house him for the night, and then give him a room, and then take him for clothes, and invite him for Thanksgiving, and before long adopt him into their family. Once they find out Michael can try out for football if he gets his grades up, they become obsessed with getting him on the team (well, Leigh Anne does. No one else seems to care so much, not even Michael). And once he’s on, there’s the matter of making sure he understands the rules, and that he uses his size to the fullest benefit of his team. We learn that Michael tested high in “protective instinct”, which makes him great for defense. Is protective instinct a thing that high school kids are tested in? Yes. The Blind Side is a true story. Stop asking questions. Throughout this process, Michael rarely speaks up for himself or objects to any of the decisions being made on his behalf. He could still be grateful and express himself, I bet, but we don’t see much of it. It should be said: Quinton Aaron plays Michael well. If the movie were told more from his perspective, he might be even more impressive. The Blind Side is Leigh Anne’s story though. The idea seems to be that she’s the hero because she’s the giver, and Michael, as the recipient, is more of a plot device than a person. If The Blind Side had just one more shade, just a little doubt here and there, it might be a more engrossing story. In Please Give, Kate has a daughter that is at turns selfish, compassionate, wise and awful. She’s allowed to be a typical teen, with all the good and bad that goes with it. Leigh Anne has a teenaged daughter too, but she barely speaks when she’s not in her cheerleader uniform.

Michael makes the team, and after a few comical examples of not knowing his own strength, he becomes the subject of a scouting war between colleges from all over the country. Of course, he needs to get his grades up to graduate, so Kathy Bates is hired as his tutor. Like Sandra Bullock, Bates has a role that would be swimming in clichés if not for the humanity of the actor playing it. Can someone introduce these women to Nicole Holofcener? There’s a fascinating scene in The Blind Side with Leigh Anne meeting Michael’s biological mother. The two women are miles apart, and make no attempt to pretend otherwise. I was taken, for a moment, with the  subtlety of the scene, and how, in a movie so intent on being true, there was finally a bit of truth. Please Give has it in spades.

Please Give: A

The Blind Side: C+